WASHINGTON, DC – After a hard-fought battle amongst power-brokers in the world of government food-suggestions, makers of the US Department of Agriculture’s “Food Pyramid” have unanimously agreed to add Girl Scout Cookies to the pinnacle of the pyramid.
“Our latest edition of the Food Pyramid included exercise as part the program, but we realized that someone climbing the pyramid had no goal, no object worth climbing for at the top,” said US Food Suggestion czar, Thom Whashburn.
The USDA suggests that having a goal – like exercising so that one may eat more Caramel Delights – completes the food pyramid and gives Americans a realistic goal that they can strive for.
“We realized that just being healthy isn’t enough. Americans want a purpose, something to achieve …and eating more peanut butter Tagalongs is just the ticket. That’s something all of our citizens can unite around,” said Whashburn.
So the DME is reminding you that this year, if you are approached by one of America’s future leaders wearing a vest full of merit badges, you can confidently buy a box or four, knowing that you’re making a donation to tomorrow — and to your health.